(Yang terbaik bukanlah mudah diterima)
Since I was little, my father, who was a medical doctor, wanted me to follow his step. I always refused. I felt that living as a doctor is not the dream I want to pursue. However my father kept his mind, and always said that I was born as a doctor, and he knew that from my “real” interest and personality. So, at the time I almost finished High-School, my father, a hard-core Catholic (well, as I do), prayed everyday, that I will be accepted in the Medical School. He even went to Lourdes for pilgrimage and asked Mother Mary to pray for me. On the same time, knew about my father intense devotion, I also prayed really hard to God and Mother Mary not to grant my father wish.
My mother tried to make both of us more ‘reasonable’ by include me in several psychological tests, so we’ll know (scientifically) whether being a doctor suits me the best. I hate my mother efforts, as most of the tests show in favor to my father’s wish. Even when I stirred the answers so the results will show that I can not be a doctor, it still said that I was suitable to be a….. DENTIST!!
Surprisingly at the time I have to filled in the application form for the university I can not betrayed my father and put the medical faculty as my first choice for UMPTN (In Indonesia, in 1995, if you want to go to State University, you have to join UMPTN- a national test, and you can have 2 or 3 choice of any faculty on any state university). Alas, I got accepted in Medical Faculty. To everybody dismay (as people said the medical faculty only chose the top 200 – so I belongs to the top 200 best student in Indonesia? Yaiks, don’t think so…..), I cried hard, and asked, why God, why I got accepted?? I was really-really angry!!
At that time I guessed God had grants father wish and not mine. I can not be angry to God, so I guess; my father was praying harder than I. After I finished Medical School, and my father passed away, I know whose prayer was actually granted by God. It was my mother’s. Beside than those tests, she also secretly prayed very hard, that I got the BEST. She did not pray that I will be accepted in Medical School, or that I got accepted in the school of my choice, she simply prayed that I got the BEST.
Although it was hard at the first years to accept that I got accepted in the medical school, finally I realized that I do enjoy the life and it was one of the best things that ever happened to me. My father died a year before I become a doctor, and I always grateful that at least he saw his dream in on its way.
My mother’s principle of prayers has become my true inspiration for my last prayers when a new friend had to go back to Indonesia……… to die. Although all of us wished for miracles, so he can be cured and life longer, I can not stopped praying so God gives him the BEST, simply the BEST for him. I guess human heart and eyes are deceitful as the BEST according to them is not always the BEST for the human self. We finally have to say our last good-bye to him last Sunday.
To accept the best sometimes is not easy. It might hurt, and sometimes it might not seem fair at the beginning. Time do heals, and time makes you understand that He always gives the BEST.
Selamat jalan Anyo, the best one deserves the best place……….